Marcus the Apodiformes


 * Please remember that this article only recounts the story of Marcus the Apodiformes from Earth 613

Act I: The Transformation

Marcus started off like any other homo sapien. He was sitting at the bench in Parque de Blanche, his favorite spot to eat his phlly cheese steak panini. One day, March 10 of 1986 to be exact, he was taking the last sip of his limited edition Mar10 Milk, when a chick walked by. This is not "chick" as in the derogatory form of referring to a women, this was a female bird. Marcus fed this chick 3 crumbs from the bottom of his panini, and she took a quick liking to him. Little did he know, the bread that he was eating that day was whole wheat, which made him pass out. When he woke, he was in bondage. He could not see anything, he could only hear the faint chirps of a bird (and, of course, Beat It by Michael Jackson). As his vision began to recover, the chirps turned to words. He soon heard, "You are now like me, brother." Suddenly he could see fully. He sees a beak in front of his face, and he soon realizes that he has become a bird. This should have made him angry, however he realized that he was already angry. Marcus was always angry. He found himself in a new world, and had a sense that he was not ever to return to his past self. Marcus was too angry to grieve, Marcus was always angry.

Act II: Yo Soy Molesto

On the third week of living with the angry birds, Marcus was lounging in his lounge when a beefy green hand landed on his shoulder. This was not the only beefy green appendage that he would see, he soon found out. Now the Angry Bird transformation was complete. Marcus went from human to Apodiformes, and his sexuality went from hetero to homosexual (this homosexuality is what gives the birds the curve they need when launching from their slingshots). He was now out for revenge. The pigs would pay for this wrongdoing, Marcus was at max anger